The Bat Mitzvah Journey

I’ve made it through a Bar Mitzvah and a Bat Mitzvah with my kids. I have one more to go. It hasn’t been an easy journey.

It all started with my son Max. I had planned a big extravaganza. In fact, people still have my deposits from that extravaganza that never happened. We ordered a bunch of supplies and had all our vendors booked for Maxopoly. It was going to be a lot of fun and it got cancelled. Max had a Zoom Mitzvah during Covid, and I was not a happy camper about it. I wanted his service to be at our synagogue and his party to be at River Works. Max studied hard and did an amazing job on the computer in front of hundreds of people watching with us. I was definitely left scarred. Proud and scarred.

Moving on to my daughter Ella’s Bat Mitzvah. I was very gun shy to plan this event. I didn’t want to go all out and have the same experience. Ella and I agreed that we would plan a small but great event for her and her friends. She did a wonderful service at our synagogue and had a great party with her friends at Santora’s banquet room. It was a success and Ella was happy with how it all came together.

My first child is my guinea pig, and we learn together. I usually have a better feel for what I’m doing with Ella. Ella gets the best of me. By the time I get to Lillie I’m tired and done. Do I really need to plan another Bat Mitzvah?

Lillie is supposed to have her Bat Mitzvah in 2025. She attends religious school on Sundays, and she attends her Hebrew tutoring lessons on zoom on Thursdays. She gives me such a hard time. In her defense, Seth and I never wanted to go to religious school either and neither did Max and Ella. No one is excited to go. My parents made me, and Seth’s parents made him go. I am not my mother, that’s for sure. She is much firmer than I am.

On the way home from school, Lillie sighed and said she didn’t like Thursdays because she has Hebrew. On Sundays, she never wants to wake up early and go to religious school. Do you blame her? Why are we making her do this? On the way home from school I felt so bad for making her do all this stuff so that she could have her Bat Mitzvah. We did two, isn’t that good enough?