📣Welcome to the Whinypaluza column called Teenage Tuesdays, written by Rebecca's daughter Ella Greene, who is 16 years old!
➡️Look forward to a new blog from Ella from a teenage perspective on Tuesdays!

Lessons from Lillie's Bat Mitzvah

 I’ve had maybe three sips of alcohol in the past 16 years, yet this Sunday I had the most violent hangover. My head hurt, I was groggy, and my entire body longed for sleep. It was horrible. It was the result of my little sister's Bat Mitzvah. But in every experience, there are lessons learned, so, here are a few of my lessons. 

1. You are not always in the spotlight–but that doesn't mean you have to be in the dark. 

It simply wasn’t about me. I didn’t practice for hours upon hours for yesterday. But, I did write a speech. I did get my hair and makeup done. I did dance my heels off, and that’s okay. I didn’t keep it lowkey and I didn’t steal the spotlight. There’s a delicate balance between the two, and we need to be more conscious of how to stay there. You don’t always have to be standing off to the side in order to not upstage someone. I didn’t need to be anxious about making the day “all about me” just because I had fun. Maybe I needed to hear this lesson the most, but if it resonates with at least one person it will be worth sharing. 

2. Focus on what matters the most 

Our society is too superficial. We worry about how things are on the outside instead of focusing on what’s happening on the inside. Lillie reading from the Torah was the most important part of yesterday, not who I sat with at the party, not what I looked like, and not what dress I wore. So, if you ever find yourself worrying about anything but the core of an event or issue–remind yourself why you care in the first place. Urge yourself to remember the core reason why what you’re doing matters. Once you do that, the stress about the little stuff may fall off. 

3. Everyone already appreciates you 

This lesson is for my mom (and all the other moms out there). We all already love and appreciate every little thing you do. We see the hard work you guys put in every day to make sure our lives run smoothly. You don’t need to plan the perfect event to be appreciated and loved. You can make mistakes, screw up, not do something, and we all still love and appreciate the effort. My parents always tell me “it's about the effort, not the outcome” and that applies to everyone and everything. Don’t stress about how an event or anything is going to go–because your family is happy you took the time to plan it. 

There are so many important things in this world. Events and details are just one of them. Remember to focus on the small moments and the larger significance of things–because if you don’t–you may find that you stressed a perfect night away. 

Until next time,

Ella Greene.

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